BOYCOTT THE B-WORD

It's the tenth, everybody said. Study. And there was never a dull moment (see as : Life was full of dull moments). There were books and papers and pens and pencils and geometry boxes lying everywhere. Different shapes and colors. But all used for one sole purpose – The B-word.
There’s this fear of not studying, studying less, studying less compared to Prerna (Yeah, Prerhu, don’t roll your eyes on this one). When the going gets tough, Prerna gets going and Aanchal doesn’t feel good (a more popular word would be ‘Mood Off’)!
But after living through all this, I’d like to raise some serious issues that are causing severe damage to the environment because of the B-word.
(Listen to this one, Aanchal, because even the ‘bus ka sweeper’ cannot do anything)

1. WASTAGE OF PAPER
Leading to deforestation. And there aren’t leaders of the Chipko Movement now, because I guess, Ganguly chopped them off with the trees while he was sitting on a fallen tree sipping his garma garam chai.

2. LOSS OF VALUABLE HUMAN RESOURCE
Fine! Fine! Semi valuable resource.
Well, lets just settle for human resource, huh?
That’s because our brains become so full and buzz with all the things that we have crammed up because ‘the CBSE only sees how well you have remembered the bookish language’.

3. EXCESSIVE USE OF PLASTIC PENS
Write your way to glory (read: sleep)

4. LOSS OF MEANINGFUL FAMILY LIFE
Books! Books! Books! Books! That’s all that you have to be with.

5. INCREASING VALUE OF PHONE BILLS
“Hello, Prerna? Page 85, second column, third line.”
“Aanchal? Civics book. Page 13. First column, ninth last line.”

6. LOSS OF TALENT
I had seriously forgotten how to rhyme stuff. Does ‘do’ rhyme with ‘go’?

7. DISCOVERY OF UNHEARD FOUL LANGUAGE
Used on teachers, books and CBSE

8. FORGETFULNESS
“O! Crap! What the fuck was my name???

9. DEPRESSION
I only used this because the newspapers popularized it
To tell you the truth, we never even thought of that

10. REPEATED ACTIVITY
Because I was so sure I’d be stuck in tenth all my life

11. LOSS OF BUSINESS TO MALL OWNERS, CINEMA COMPLEX OWNERS AND OTHER POOR FELLOWS
I mean, what about India’s economy? We are the saviors, you know. You shut half the population up, what do you get? A poor country!

12. LACK OF FODDER CROPS FOR ANIMALS
Green vegetables are good for health, you see. So dump them on us!
So, now that you see the B-word for what it really is and the amount of damage it has done only in the selfish pursuit of a literacy certificate, I presume you will never see the B-word as you once saw it. Eh?

Also, when I told Prerhu what my next post would be about, she just said,
"O! Kika! Get over it"
But I wont. However, I do admit that I will be a bitch like all my seniors and tell all the present tenthees that tenth is a cakewalk...(Compared to eleventh, it is)